To Will Smith: Please Don't.

Seriously, why?!?   My protest against the abominable idea contained in that link I just posted has nothing to do with the fact that I play for a kickball team called Cobra Kai.  The team name wasn't my idea.  But it's still disgusting. 

You know what, Will?  I always defended you.  I defended you against criticisms of your average (at best) rapping skills.  I told everyone how amazing Jassy Jeff is.  I defended your place in both music history and in music today, saying that we'd be better off with more Will Smiths than we would be with more 50 Cents. 

But I can't defend this.  

This is just more fodder for critics who accuse you of being nothing more than a panderer, inoffensively catering to the biggest swath of mainstream America you can find.  Do you really think everybody is pandering for a remake of a cult classic movie -- one that made the careers of two now-beloved '80's actors?  Of replacing the lead with your son...and another main character with Jackie Chan? 

Why don't you remake Fletch, The Breakfast Club and Caddyshack while you're at it?  Any remakes of Animal House hiding in your bag of tricks?   Wait...Animal House would be too edgy, wouldn't it?  Maybe you can put Jaden into a remake of Goonies. 

The good news?  There's still time, Will.  Time for you to change your mind about this.  Time for you to pull the plug on this abomination.  Time for you to keep yourself from chewing up, spitting out and trampling all over the childhoods of an entire generation of Americans who love this movie as it was.

Because I promise you, Will: if this project sees the light of day, I won't be your advocate anymore.  You'll be dead to me.  So on behalf of hundreds of thousands of people between the ages of 27 and 34: please don't.  

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